I have a job interview Thursday morning for a better job that I really want at SF.  It would give me the core business experience I need if I want to go into management, I'd be challenged, most likely get a pay increase, and would get to work regular business hours for the first time in my life.  I am completely qualified and prepared for it and would do well at it, but the competition is ridiculous, so I'm nervous.  Unfortunately, that lack of confidence has come across in the mock interviews I've had so far.  I just need to go in there remembering that if God wants me to have this job, I'll get it, no matter what I do or don't say. 

It's very odd how your priorities change after you finish school.  When I was in college, school was the #1 focus of my life (other than God of course).  Work fell in after that, and then personal relationships.  That part of my life suffered I know.  I had them, but it was very difficult to keep up with everyone.  I sure as heck didn't have time to date, which I knew at the time but still desired.  Now that school is out of the way, I put that drive into work, trying to get myself to the next level.  However, I still have a lot more free time than I used to, which means that I can invest personally in others.  I love it.  I also love that I have more time for sleeping, working out, and going and DOING stuff.  I never have to automatically say, "I can't.  I have to study."  It's so nice.  To people still in college:  It WILL get better.  It IS worth it.  Just hang in there.  Of course, there's the people that just love college and never want to leave.  I never could understand that, personally.  But hey, different strokes.

I feel at times that prayer, while being the best way to communicate with God, can also be the most frustrating.  It's frustrating because sometimes God's answer is different from your request.  He doesn't always say yes or give you a clear answer or confirm a direction or whatever you're asking of him.  Sometimes the answer is "no," "wait," or leaves it up to you.  I never want him to leave anything up to me, because I know what plans is always the best.  However, there's a double-edged sword in that sometimes I don't want what he has planned at the moment, because I want something else.  Garth Brooks recorded a moving song some years ago called "Unanswered Prayer."  It had a good message in that the man in the story was grateful for the fact that God didn't grant him his teenage prayer of giving him a girl he knew, and he ended up with the woman he married.  While I don't believe that God ever leaves a prayer truly unanswered, the point was the same:  God knows better.  While I know this intellectually, I tell it to myself, and I tell it to my friends, I do struggle at times with applying it to my own life.  No one ever said that faith is easy.  However, without faith, I have nothing.